A- MUSE-in Cover Revolt

A- MUSE-in Cover Revolt
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Saturday, April 26, 2014

BM HOLMES IS IN THE HOUSE.

BM Holmes has arrived...
get your mind out of the toilet...BM stands for 
BIG MOUTH.

As you can see I really DO have a BIG MOUTH...which means I've got a lot to say...from time to time.

TODAY...I am gonna step up on my 
soapbox and expound upon...
FANTASY.

I went on over to the 
MuseitUp Publishing
MUSE IT UP Bookstore and 
MuseitUp Publishing
MUSE IT HOT Bookstore to see what is winging its away in the Fantasy Skies above of...I trolled, trawled, and fluttered about until my mouth opened wide and I knew I HAD to yelp from the rafters about what I found.

If you LOVE fantasy, 
put your feet up, grab your notebook, and be prepared to take notes.

Since it's Saturday AFTERNOON, let's start with Mainstream MIU Fantasy...
What's available for the avid lover of dragons, 
werewolves, 
pixies, 
vampires, 
gnomes, 
elves, 
leprechauns, and other 
UNUSUAL fare?

I BM, decided I should tell you about books I'VE read in this genré...and can HIGHLY recommend...since I AM a BIG MOUTH,
Let's get started.
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BEYOND YESTERDAY by L.J. Holmes. Can the wind prevent a person from escaping? Can a ghost from the past reach through the vagaries of time and shed light on the past? Can a video for Reba MacEntire's song FANCY propel a woman to face her disjointed past, and maybe move BEYOND YESTERDAY? This is a HAUNTING short story.
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BILLY COOPER'S AWESOME NIGHTMARE by Penny Estelle. This is Book One in Ms. Estelle's powerful short story Series, aptly entitled...THE WICKWARE SAGAS. Ms Estelle wings Miss Wickware's students back in time to live the historical events they've been glossing over as HO-HUM stuff. I LOVE...OMG...DO I LOVE THIS SERIES! Each book is a MUST READ! You'll be surprised how much YOU'LL learn. DYNAMITE!!!!
BUMPED BACK IN TIME by Penny Estelle...This is Book Four in Ms. Estelle's amazing THE WICKWARE SAGAS. This series should be required reading for anyone and everyone who loves a good story.

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CHANGE PARTNERS by James Hartley...A real Winner. Look at that cover...It makes you ask...are the couple GHOSTS? SHADOWS or something creepier? 
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DARK HEIRLOOM and DARK LIASON by J.D. Brown. How does one become a vampire? She's not undead, nor was she bitten...so how did Ema Marx become...well a FANGER? This is an intriguing series packed with fun, angst, and so much more.
DIAMONDS FROM THE ROUGHAGE by LJ Holmes. Nion is a dragon back in the days of Camelot. He's the heat behind the formation of diamonds a joint enterprise between Camelot and the land of ice and snow Fridgeonia. Arthur's dead. The Knights are off in pursuit of The Holy Grail...and diamond production is down. Can Nion teach a champion who's allergic to armor, to rise up and reclaim the pipeline for diamonds again? 
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FLASH TO THE PAST by Penny Estelle...This is Book Three in Ms. Estelle's fantastic THE WICKWARE SAGAS. In this book Miss Wickware's students and we, the readers, are whisked back in time to Trenton...and George Washington's crossing and the Battle at Monmouth and Molly Pitcher. This is HISTORY at it's best. It comes alive in ways no history text book can compete with.

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FORTUNAUS by James Hartley. James Hartley writes a LOT of powerful fantasy stories. In this one...the magic...believe it our not...is IN the box! How different is that?
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GETTING AHEAD by Marion Sipe. Okay...this one was a little bit weird...but hey...a head of and by itself can be quite the fantasy experience...right?
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HER LAST DAY by Kat Holmes and L.J. Holmes...Pompeii, August 24, 79 AD. Daria wakes to a life weighed down by her arranged marriage to a violent man, and the suspicion she's pregnant. It's a day like all the others since her husband bought her from her father in Rome and brought her to this hellish place called Pompeii. With Acteon, the slave her husband gave her as a wedding gift, and the man she trusts above all others, at her side, she visits the market place, the one friend she has who knows how truly bad her marriage is...and all of this is before...before Vesuvius erupts. Will Daria and Acteon make it out of Pompeii and survive? This is a very powerful short story.

HIDDEN by Kat Holmes...if you love vampires but are a little disgusted by the antiquated attitudes of male vamps being the power behind the FANGS, you're gonna love Kat's Hekate's Web Series.This is Book One: Lilith is a NEW vamp...made 30 years ago and kept in HIDING...But when she COMES OUT she's gonna show those male vamps more than a thing or two.I predict this series will become the next BEST VAMP Saga. 
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IN MY OWN SHADOW by Susan A. Royal...oh boy...this one has just about EVERYTHING! You've got banshees...(did I forget to mention them?) you've got vampyr, you've got Shadow Riders, one of my favorites, TIME PORTALS, and cities wafting by on clouds. 
LAUNCHING SISTERS TO WITCH CAMP by LRS...This is a fun book...with a message...Be careful what you wish for! I loved, loved, loved it. A GREAT book for young and old at heart. It's sort of a witchy tale reminiscent of the old Gypsy tales.
LIFE WITH A FIRE-BREATHING GIRLFRIEND by Bryan Fields. OMG this was such a delightful read. I loved the fact that the dragon shifter in this story was FEMALE. That alone makes it a MUST READ. If you love dragons, but would like to see the shifter as a woman...OMG is this the read for you!
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LIFE'S JOURNEY by L.J. Holmes. I've got to admit I fell in love with the cover for this one, done by the amazing Suzannah Safi. It is so ethereal and haunting. When her heart stops beating, her soul rises called by the spirit of her grandmother. Off she goes, reliving the many hills and valleys of the life she's just led...but can she return from this NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE...or should she stay and wait for her loved ones back there to die and join her here?

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REVELATIONS by Julie Lynn Hayes...This isn't THE SERMON ON THE MOUNT...this brings a whole new dimension to Christ's life and that of Judas. This is a book that will stay with you long after you've read the last line. 
RICHES TO RAGS by Penny Estelle...Book 5 in THE WICKWARE SAGA Series...I hadn't read or learned about the Orphan Train until I read this book. Ms. Estelle has such a vast knowledge of history and a glorious way of bringing it to life through her Time Traveling Series.

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RIDE OF A LIFETIME by Penny Estelle. This is Book Two in Ms. Estelle's Powerful THE WICKWARE SAGAS. In this book Miss Wickware takes us back to the Revolutionary War and a ride that didn't get the press Paul Revere's did. AGAIN I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE THIS SERIES!!
SEEKER by Kat Holmes. This is Book TWO in Kat's Hekate's Web Series. Lilith, our dynamo female vamp is off shopping...something she wasn't allowed to do for the thirty years Hekate kept her hiding while she cooked. In SEEKER, there's a dangerous orb hidden somewhere in the world the good vamps must find before the bad vamps. The manipulative goddess drops a scroll in their hands and commands them to unravel the clues in the scroll and find that orb. Atu, a general in the good vamps camp accepts the assignment and sets off to kidnap Edeline...a powerful psychic. This is an EXCELLENT second book for this amazing series.

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TEEN ANGEL by James Hartley. I remember a song when I was a kid called TEEN ANGEL performed by Mark Dinning and Alex Murray in 1959. The song is about a teenage tragedy...a boy and his girlfriend are out for a ride when their car stalls on a railroad track. He tosses her to safety and becomes a TEEN ANGEL. In James' story our angel is a girl. She comes down from heaven assuming her boyfriend is still a teen, waiting for her to return...but that's not what she finds. What's a man to do when an angel returns certain she's your forever despite your wife and teen-aged daughter...oh and you got rid of you DA haircut ages ago? 
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THE BLUE OF HER HAIR, THE GOLD OF HER EYES by John B. Rosenman. There are books you read that have you cheering the hero/heroine so loudly when you finish it, you know you'll go back and reread it over and over again. THIS is such a book. There's a condition...is it a plague?...who knows, that Rachel has contracted. The medical world tells her euthanasia is the only option open to her...will she take it? And if she doesn't...what then? I LOVED this book and want to thank John for writing it. One day this will be a classic...and it couldn't happen too soon! 
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THE BOOK OF HELEN by Sherry G. Antonetti. Helen of Troy...is she a fantasy creature? Well, maybe, maybe not. She's certainly a figure of myth and legend, but under the deft guidance of Sherry G. Antonetti she's larger than legend. I learned so much about the Helen post Troy, post the death of her husband and the exile from Rhodes by her sons. Fantasy? Myth? Legend? More? This book is all of that!
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THE CALLING OF MIKE MALONE by M.L. Archer. What do you do when the dad you thought long dead pops up and reveals he's a fallen angel who wants you to be the anti-Christ? You're in your twenties already successful with a dynamite girlfriend. Do you need this? 
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THE KING OF SILK by Joe D. Trent...What's a man to do when he wakes up in the 15th century? Joe Douglas Trent plops poor Michael smack dab in the middle of 15th century Italy. Talk about culture shock?
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THE LYCAN MOON by S. Durham...Werewolves...S. Durham knows how to bring the furry ones to life and make you want to play Fur & Fangs. Dana Pierce is a successful columnist with an agenda. Calen Meer is a shifter who wants to keep his small town below everyone's radar. Who will win?

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THE MINOTAUR by Chrystalla Thoma...Greek myth and legend comes alive in the capable hands of Greek author, Chrystalla Thoma. I'm an avid Chrystalla Thoma fan. She creates some of the most powerful short Greek tales I've ever read, and this one ranks right up there with the rest.
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VENGEANCE IS SWEET by Jo Ramsey. I was first drawn to this book by its stellar cover done by Mike Zambrano, but then I read the blurb on the back cover and had to dive in. Omara is a demon of vengeance working for hell. Problem is, she likes to bend the rules from time to time..actually too often, so gets her demonic self placed on probation. LOVED this book. LOVED the premise, LOVED how Jo Ramsey weaves Omara's tale.
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VERSES;THE LOST SONG by Janie Franz. Janie Franz has created an amazing world with her Bowdancer Series. Jan-nell, eleven summers ago, left her daughter with the sisterhood so she could live with Khrin and raise their son Bearin.Ms. Franz has created a civilization that reminds me so much of the Amazon women. It is rich in detail, bold in integrity, and heart enchantingly intense.
Time to move on to the Erotic Fantasy Stuff. 
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BIG GIRLS DON'T CRY WOLF by Kay Dee Royal...Werewolves..Ms. Royal knows how to spin the fur and make you long to howl at the moon..and maybe a hunk too. I read this book when it first came out back in 2010, and have reread it three times since. Which should tell you what a great story it is.
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BLUE STREAKS by Pat Dale. One of the things I really hate about this book is Pat Dale passed on so can't give us new books to salivate over. However, at least he's left us a rich portfolio to tease and please us until we move on joining him up there. BLUE STREAKS is cleverly deceptive. You think you know where Pat is taking you, but you're wrong. LOVE Pat Dale's cunning twists and turns as he manipulates the space-time continuum like a candy maker manipulates taffy. 
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CRIMSON WATERS by Kat Holmes...Holy Moly...This is Book FOUR in Kat's GODS AT WORK SERIES...the gods from Olympus are among us...Poseidon...what that god can do with water should be packaged and sold to all women everywhere. When Poseidon orders the waters to bend to his will, wowee!
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DANCES AT DAWN by Kat Holmes...Book Five in Kat's GODS AT WORK SERIES...Apollo is among us...and OMG to have the woman he loves he's willing to barter with THE FATES to give up his immortality and defy his Daddy Zeus...the King of the Gods, but even he is afraid of THE FATES!


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HEART OF THE QUEEN by Kat Holmes...This is Book TWO in Kat's GODS AT WORK SERIES...Hera...she's been portrayed as a hate filled, vengeful queen...but now that she's among us, a gifted midwife, we learn her truth...and Boy Howdy does she have a lot of love in her.
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FROZEN by Kat Holmes...Book One in the ARTICA LIGHTS Series. Artica is a land of perpetual cold with a queen, Awni, whose skin is so cold it is the source of execution for her people in Artica. Tichi is the one and only god. Awni is his chosen daughter...a daughter her loves. Awni is alone. No one can get close to her because to touch her skin is instant death. She cannot share her heart, her desires, her longings...or can she? Artica Lights swirl...one moment Artica is as it has always been...the next Brent swept into the snow swirls of the Lights lands in Artica. You will love the world Kat created. You'll love Tichi, Awni, Elric, and cheer for Brent. 

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IN DEATH'S ARMS by Kat Holmes...Book Three in her GODS AT WORK SERIES...Hades...when you see or hear that name, do you think...vicious...conniving...evil...? Me too...until I read this book. I want a Hades of my own!
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LOVE AND CONSEQUENCES by Heather Kuehl...okay dokey...This is Book Two in A WHITE WOLF STORY Series...A white female wolf shifter. She's rare and so is her heart. Two women shifters, in love...can they beat the odds...especially since her parents, who destroy female/female lovers are coming to town?
LOVE POTION # 9.5 by Kat Holmes...Fairyland has gas...lots of it, thanks to the words uttered by a rather forgetful but powerful witch. The stinky town is up in arms. Husbands caught in the malodorous spell, are forced to sleep outside on the hard ground rather than in the comfort of their marital beds. Lucy Mixernight is working round the clock trying to find a potion to counter the stench...This is a funny, short, fantasy book and the first in Kat Holmes' TALES OF FAIRYLAND Series.
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ONE NIGHT STUD by Kat Holmes and L.J. Holmes. He's a centaur who only has one night to find his one true love, and convince her to ride his stallion forever. This is a SHORT book rich in fantasy detail. If you love horses, how about trying centaurs? They know how to stamp their hooves and spread their manes.
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REFLECTIONS OF ICE by Kat Holmes. Book Two in the ARTICA LIGHTS series. Elric retires to his...spartan room weary from another long day attending to his Queen. He adores Awni, raised her from infancy, but he longs for something he cannot name...until he looks into his mirror one night and sees the Lights...the Aritca Lights...and when they stop spinning and dazzling, a woman, a beautiful woman reflects back to him.  This is a delicious sequel to Awni's story. I LOVED Kat's allowing Delia to proudly stand up and vanquish her demon. I also loved how Kat showed Elric's capacity for gentle respect. LOVE THIS SERIES!
SAVAGE SMOKE by Kay Dee Royal...he was the enemy, the rogue in Kay Dee's first book....STARING INTO THE EYES OF CHANCE...can he be redeemed?
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STARING INTO THE EYES OF CHANCE by Kay Dee Royal...Chance is a shapeshifter...he's also a lotta hunky man. After thirty-four years of a passion-less marriage, Olivia learns at his funeral, her husband was really a HOUND DOG! Chance is a Lycan...cop...and more than a little drool worthy. Chance is drawn to Olivia's wild-life preserve because of of a murdering lycan. Murder, danger, and drop-your-drawers-now passion. PHEW can Kay Dee deliver the goods!
SUC-U by L.J. Holmes. She's a succubus working for Succubus United, the equivalent of a dream bordello...but when she's assigned Drake Phaeton...a man she intends to invade more deeply than JUST in his dreams.
SUC-U TOO by L.J. Holmes. Where the hell is Ambreaton Nightshade? She was supposed to switch with her tonight so she could go and see the new Kellany exhibition in New Hope, PA. Bre didn't come back after heading out to tease and please Drake Phaeton's dreams. Ballisma (BAL) Buster MUST go to the exhibition. She may be a succubus invading men's dreams with lust, and delicious seduction, but tonight all she wants is to be an art connoisseur. 
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THE OAK KING'S DAUGHTER by Emily Pikkasso. The Oak King...autumn's master is her father. She's expected to dance attendance on the sycophants brought into the realm to win her hand, but Dara has eyes ONLY for Tinne the new mage...and she means to have him no matter what!
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THE PENDULUM SWINGS by L.J. Holmes...She was an Egyptian slave just seconds ago...before her owner's superior plunged his sword into her belly. Now she's here, inside the body of a hated blonde, married to a hunky guy who hates her, and mother to the adorable little girl she easily enchants. She's not Joanna, she's Siri. How will she convince the husband she's wed to in this world, she's worth hanging on to?
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UNDER THE HUNTRESS MOON by Kat Holmes...Book Six in the GODS AT WORK Series...I first fell in love with this book when I saw the cover...isn't it great? Done by Karen Phillips, it's a work of art. Artemis...goddess of the hunt...expert with the bow, and owner of a nature and wilderness school as Diana Fox. A powerful story filled with deceit, grief, anger, and treachery. LOVED this one. (I want to be Artemis when I grow up!)
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WHITE WOLF by Heather Kuehl. This is Book One in the White Wolf Tales Series. Kalia Seffmoyer is a rare albino werewolf...every alpha in the world wants her...and it doesn't matter what she wants...until the symbol shows up on the wrong werewolf mate.
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WORKING UNDER COVERS by Kat Holmes. Book One in her GODS AT WORK Series...Aphrodite is among us running her very own computer dating service...but women are disappearing and the cops are watching. Will the goddess of love and the undercover investigator she's drawn to, find out why women are going missing from her ranks before dead bodies start showing up?

That's it for now...but BM Holmes will return and showcase OTHER books...like...maybe HORROR...or SCI-FI...or YOUNG ADULTS...Hmmm.

Until then...

Friday, April 18, 2014

SEEKER by KAT HOLMES...VAMPIRES GONE WILD



SEEKER is book TWO in Kat Holmes' award winning Vampire series, HEKATE'S WEB.

It sort of picks up where Book One HIDDEN ends. Lilith, that kick ass FEMALE vamp from book one is off shopping with the other female vamps. After spending 30 years HIDDEN, thank you very much Hekate for keeping Lilith HIDDEN for so long in your web.  

Lilith deserves at least ONE shopping trip with the GIRLS, doesn't she? Especially after all the ass she kicked in Book One. 

Good thing she's off shopping...if she weren't, there's no way she'd allow ATU, with his mega TUDE to go find/kidnap a psychic and head off in search of the orb Hekate wants the good vamps run by 

Benjamin to find before the bad vamps run by the nefarious 

Montague does.

This is one seriously BAD orb. Three men died entombing it centuries ago...

Atu takes on the quest, first to decode the scroll Hekate drops in the good vamps laps. They have to locate each element of the 

KEY...and 

time's running out.

Lots of edge of your seat tension...HOWEVER...once the parts of the KEY have been located, then comes the hardest part...locating the ORB.

The bad vamps are nipping at Atu's heel...Correction...Atu's and his kidnapped psychic, 

Edeline's.

Atu is not the most patient or understanding seeker, but Edeline IS the real deal...

a psychic more powerful than the vampire can begin to understand...and less you all forget, hovering in the background, directing many aspects of Atu and Edeline's quest is 

Hekate...a goddess more manipulative than The Fates in weaving a tapestry so complex, you'll wonder if she's for or against the good vamps.

SEEKER...edge of your seat action...deception...and more. 

And OMG...right now...guess what? If you buy SEEKER via MIH, you'll get 

HIDDEN for FREE...BOTH books for the price of ONE! Can't beat that can you?

Follow the SEEKER link to Kat's MIH buy page and read more.

Vampires...gotta love 'em.

Thursday, April 10, 2014

TO BAT OR NOT TO BAT...THAT IS THE QUESTION...VAMPIRES TODAY...WHAT MAKES THEM...DROOL-WORTHY AND WHAT MAKES THEM...HOHUM

VAMPIRES...they're are every where! In books, on TV, in movies, and in gossip around the water coolers at work or the cafeteria tables at school.

I got into vampires by accident. I picked up a book called SAFE HARBOR by Christine Feehan...not about vampires, but about SEVEN sisters with tons of paranormal powers.

Once you've read one book by an author than excites you, its natural to start looking at other books written by the same author...and this lead me to Ms. Feehan's Carpathian Series...a rich, many booked series.

I also got my hands on Sherrilyn Kenyon's, Dark Hunter's Series and Charlaine Harris' Sookie Stackhouse Series. (Others have come and gone along the way, but these were the ones I latched onto with a tenacity that kept me lapping them up for several years...although, honesty requires I admit I only STILL buy Christine Feehan.)

There are reasons why I moved away from some of these authors...and although I still am avidly reading/buying Christine Feehan, I am not crazy about so much of my hard earned book money ending up purchasing a dictionary of Carpathian dialogue, chants, and other non-necessary minutiae. Still, the stories are still rich enough to keep me coming back for more.

I ADORED Sherrilyn Kenyon and eagerly anticipated ACHERON'S story....but the woman we were directed to believe was his mate, somehow disappeared in the long awaited ACHERON release. When you've been eagerly following the breadcrumbs, it leaves a sour taste in your reading digestion when the promise luring you to hang in there, doesn't come to pass. Acheron's story was brutal, without the anticipated reversal of his fortunes.

My turning away from SOOKIE STACKHOUSE I cannot blame on Charlaine Harris' authorship...but on the idiot behind the TV series TRUE BLOOD. The TV show came into being many years after we, the fans, had been salivating over the trials and tribulations of Sookie, and Eric...I really did not like Bill...he was such a vamp nosing creep...but for reasons I'll never understand, unless it's because the actor who portrayed him became Anna Paquin's real life hubby, he on TV morphed into Eric's superior...Bill, who JUST became a vamp during the Civil War? YUCK!!!

The TV show RUINED the book series...but it goes farther...if you go in today to look up the Sookie series on Amazon, the series comes up as (SOOKIE STACKHOUSE/TRUE BLOOD) series. I was turned off to the series with the onset of Season TWO...so I knew the series ONLY as THE SOOKIE STACKHOUSE Series.

I understand the lure of seeing your work on TV or on the screen...but when your loyal fans have taken the years to BUILD you into such a success to give so much of the creativity that made us LOVE Sookie away puts (PAID IN FULL) to your dedication to your fans and our reason to stay loyal. I regret to say I could not bring myself to read new Sookie books, nor could I reread the ones I had...(I'd purchased the entire series in hard cover up until Season two shattered the foundation of the Sookie Series...ended up donating them to the local library.)

I gravitated away from vampires, with the exception of the Christine Feehan Carpathian Series (despite the over abundance of Carpathian fillers)...never intending to go back.

I found SHAPESHIFTERS....AHHHH another paranormal form of heaven...and luckily it was at the same time I got my Christmas Miracles Series published at Muse It Up Publishing, December 1, 2010.

I was afforded the glorious opportunity to read authors at the beginning of their magnificent climb to world-wide fan-dom 
So who did I find?

Oh Be Still my lucky heart...My first...the incredible 
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BIG GIRLS DON'T CRY WOLF by Kay Dee Royal,
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STARING INTO THE EYES OF CHANCE also by Kay Dee Royal, and its sequel
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SAVAGE SMOKE 

Guess you can tell Ms. Royal is a star on the cusp, and she also loves werewolves...Having read all of her books so far...I can promise one and all, you will too!

I'd be very remiss if I didn't tell you all about S.Durham...WOW!
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THE LYCAN MOON was my first S. Durham werewolf tale...and of course it made me panting for MORE.
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JAGUAR SUN... also by S. Durham, is phenomenal!

And then you can truly get into the ups and downs of the werewolfie world with Heather Kuehl. Didn't see this one coming...but OH WHAT A STORY! Worth the read!
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WHITE WOLF 

I thought I'd died and gone to wolfie heaven when Tierney O'Malley came to Muse and released HER first tale of furry whoop-t- doo
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WOLF'S SOUL...fangs...oh yeah!

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WALKER'S RUN by Mel Favreax...hang on a second while I lick my chops...
I haven't read this next one yet...just found it...but it looks SCRUMPTIOUS in a dangerous kinda way, also by Mel Favreux...
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SHADOW WALKER

Werewolves...but Dragons are shapeshiting among us too... 

Bryan Fields gave me a tremendous..."so you want to be an animal" story with his book...What a delightful read!
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LIFE WITH A FIRE-BREATHING GIRLFRIEND

I could go on and on and on...but I'm a creature of habit...plus I get the rare privilege of getting to read the next author's books as they are in the making.

As you already know I have an EXTREMELY high standard when it comes to VAMPIRE tales...I'm constantly amazed by the creative brilliance of this next MUSE author's HEKATE'S WEB vampire series. 

She doesn't waste time with elaborate...easy to forget titles...oh no...she goes right for the literary jugular and pours AB+ tales into you receptive heart, stoking your salivary glands, and giving you stories to drool over, so you'll beg for more. (JUST like a Master Vamp!)

Kat Holmes' HEKATE'S WEB SERIES...is waiting.
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HIDDEN book one...30 years Hekate has kept Lilith percolating after seeing to it she got turned. WHY?
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SEEKER book two...Atu must decode the ancient scrolls Hekate hands her vamps. They MUST find the horrifyingly powerful orb before the evil ones do. What lengths will he go to fulfill Hekate's mandate?

There you have it...my whys and wherefores about authors I adored but grew weary of, and the authors who are stirring my reading passions anew and why. 

Follow the links to all the books above...you won't be sorry.


Thursday, April 3, 2014

A BIRTHDAY LAMENT


Forty Years ago I gave birth to you, but when I look at the cherished photos of my precious baby, wearing your onesie, sitting like a little potentate among your many first year Christmas gifts, your chubby face awed by the discoveries at the end of a 

Toy phone truck, or see the magical charm in your huge grin and twinkling eyes, a lump the size of the Grand Canyon forms in my throat.


I love you so much, but life has not been kind to us, has it My Son? Somewhere along the way you stopped wanting me in your life, in your thoughts, and in your heart.

I made mistakes...monumental ones...ones I look back on and more often than not still can't figure out how I could have done differently.

My time is dwindling. When I look out at the world of today, it rivals the increasing thickening of my aging skin. I kept hoping we'd find a bridge and move beyond the inadequacies I brought into being your mom...but some strands cannot be unraveled from the massive ball of tattered hopes and dreams they cling to.

There's this break inside me silently bleeding into my soul with each passing day, and even though I have tried finding a common ground, I have to admit and accept the defeat 

growling like an angry, untamed beast between us.

I love you my son. None of the deep fodder existing between us has changed that, but with my life inching its way to my 

final hurrah, it is with a heavy, 

so very heavy heart, I must accept you are lost to me until we are both beyond the veil where all the inconsequential is stripped away and 

love is all that matters.



I don't know if you love me...I DO know you hold me in enmity...but I hope beneath the roiling disdain you have for me, a spark of the love we shared when you were 

My Little Man still exists. 

So on this, your fortieth birthday, I want, no need to say, I am sorry I only taught you to hate me, and I wish you love, joy, contentment, and peace.

Happy Birthday, Son.

Love You Forever and Beyond,
Mom